Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Giving In

I started this process completely naive. On January 1 of this year, I sent my first batch of query letters. They were terrible. Naturally, my first round of agents were all heavy hitter super agents - agents of all my favorite YA authors. But somehow one of those agents sent back a personalized rejection that was ironically encouraging. It was the first one I received. Not only was I thrilled, but I started believing that this process would be easy. It would only be a matter of time before my debut novel would be on store shelves....insert sheepish laugh here.

As I said, I was completely naive. I also swore I would have my limitations. I am, after all, a teacher and a mom. Spare time isn't a current luxury in my life. I swore to myself I wouldn't (1) Enter writing contests (2) Start a second book if my first book flopped (3) Start a blog.....all of which are completely time consuming. If my current manuscript didn't make it through, I'd turn in my writing hat and let bygones be bygones.

Five months later, I learned a couple crucial facts about myself that I'd been trying to ignore. I'm not so good at quitting, and I love that whole time consuming writing thing I do in the spare minutes I have when my son is sleeping or watching his favorite morning cartoon. And so, I find myself quite frequently entering contests, starting my second book, and now...my blog.

During that time, I've been both humbled and every now and again refilled with that nagging tinge of hope that keeps me going. It's always timely, isn't it? Just when I'm about to quit, something happens - a full request, another personalized encouraging rejection (it's funny how much I cling to those things) - that rejuvenates me all over again.

I have big ideas for this blog... we'll see how they transpire. In the mean time, it's up and running. Now I can enter a wicked writing contest (which requires a blog) in two days with my fingers crossed and my silly naive optimism tucked in my back pocket.

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